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Relationship with yourself.

by Agata Dzierżawa
The relationship with yourself is a picture of a woman looking at herself in a hand mirror.

When the soul becomes established in the physical body, that is, when it creates its earthly identity, also called the ego, there is a period in which it begins to experience life in physical form through this identity. During early childhood, their basic patterns of action are recorded, the foundation of which is primarily their relationship with their parents.

In this article, you will learn about the 9 pillars of a successful relationship with yourself: self-acceptance, inner focus, taking care of yourself, finding your life goal, self-esteem, self-esteem, developing your potential, self-confidence and self-consistency.

What is the ego experiencing of life? On searching for one’s own independence, identity, and interaction with others by entering various types of relationships. And also, the soul working out karma from previous incarnations. Independence, on the other hand, consists in distancing from parents, creating a love relationship and integrating with various social groups.

However, interaction with the outside world carries many dangers for the soul. The newly formed ego is very fragile and delicate; therefore, it undergoes further influences and transformations in the process of integration with other people. The more it needs new authorities, the more insecure it is of its own worth and the more problems it has with maintaining its boundaries. The people you spend time with have a huge impact on you and your well-being, as well as your views, beliefs, choices, and even your appearance, way of speaking or behaving.

Relationship with yourself.

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Relationship with yourself.

Therefore, the most important sentence of this stage should be first of all building a relationship with oneself, i.e. integrating the ego with the soul.

Otherwise, the process of building up the layers of the ego begins, which over time results in an increasing separation of the ego from the soul and the painful consequences of this separation.

The foundation of your entire life and the most important relationship you build in your life is your relationship with yourself. It depends on it whether you are a good employee, partner, parent, or friend. But what is such a relationship? It is, above all, a healthy love for yourself. It’s the way you treat yourself.

A relationship with yourself is one of the most intimate relationships there is because only you are the only person you can look inside. And although you try to be close to other people, you never know exactly what is going on inside them. You have this ability only and excluding yourself, because you are the center of your reality, and you are its creator. And although you have no influence on the events and experiences that happen in your life, you are responsible for your reactions to them. And for how they will affect your self-esteem.

A healthy relationship with yourself should be based on 9 key pillars, which are:


It is about accepting your advantages and disadvantages. Its basis is knowing yourself. Understand the motives that govern your decisions and behaviors. Recognition of your individuality, uniqueness, and respect for it. Discovering your potential, learning about strengths and weaknesses. Deciphering your soul age, type, individual soul overlays, personality type and aura. Recognition of your male and female energy. Understanding the karmic relationships that apply to you or other soul contracts. Getting to know your psychic personality. Identify the archetypes of mass consciousness that govern you.

Concentration on your inner world.

It is mainly about finding time for yourself to have an inner insight. It is awareness of your internal processes. What you feel, what you think, or why you feel anxiety and fear.

It is also about introducing mindfulness and some spiritual practice into your life. A look at whether your male and female energies are in balance. Identifying what needs, including unconscious needs, you should satisfy. Looking after yourself. Get to know your mammal’s brain and identify how happiness hormones and cortisol affect your life. Observation of your dreams. Recognize your bonding style. Controlling your thoughts to be positive and consciously manifest your desires. Creating the life, you dream about yourself. Using your imagination and visualization as best you can.

Taking care of yourself.

Look at your eating habits and take care of a healthy diet that provides all the nutrients. Cleansing the body of toxins. Drinking the right amount of water. Physical activity and sport. Cleansing your aura. Adequate amount of sleep and relaxation. Recreation. Proper breathing and working on conscious breathing.

Relationship with yourself.

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Relationship with yourself.

Finding Your Life Purpose.

Giving meaning to your life and work. Finding your life mission and developing your talents and passion. Letting go of your creativity. Pursuing your interests, having a hobby.


It is an appraisal of your worth built on self-acceptance, not comparing yourself with others. It’s recognizing your beliefs about yourself. About your appearance and life attitude. Recognition of your soul wound. Looking at relationships with parents. Recognition of your core beliefs and level of attachment to them.


It’s feeling like a person. It’s a good relationship with your emotions and feelings. Allowing yourself to experience and feel them and express them freely. And, being understanding for yourself and forgiving yourself.

Continuous development of your potential.

It is the release of emotions blocked in your body. Changing your troublesome habits. Heal your inner child. Eliminating your negative beliefs and replacing them with new, supportive ones. Changing your habits and improving your character. Constant learning and development. Flexibility and adaptation to changing internal and external conditions. Setting yourself challenges, goals and achieving them. Developing yourself and discovering your talents and possibilities. Discovering the potential of all types of your intelligence.


It is self-acceptance. Thinking well of yourself. Say what you think respecting the boundaries of the other person. It is the acceptance and awareness of the entire range of personality traits and the integration of their conflicting energies. Trust yourself. Self-awareness.

Consistency with yourself.

It is the integration of all the above elements together. The unity of body, mind, and spirit. Being authentic and spontaneous. Acting in accordance with your beliefs and values, not with the visions, needs, influences, or expectations of others. Make commitments and take responsibility for yourself, your feelings, and your actions. Readability and clarity for others. Make others feel good in your company because you feel good about yourself at a deep level.

A relationship with yourself, like any other relationship, should be based on love – unconditional love for yourself.

Self-criticism, self-devaluation, excessive demands, or exploitation of one’s body, eating any food, desensitizing internal fear, pain or shame with alcohol, compulsive eating, drugs, or sex is not self-love. Escape into the virtual world or perfectionism and workaholism, neither.

However, if you think that the matter of self-love will be dealt with by a psychologist and psychotherapy, you are wrong. Yes, it will solve some of your problems, address the needs of one of the dimensions of your existence, but you must take care of the rest yourself. You must heal yourself on all levels of existence. Not only the ego and the current incarnation. Every dimension of your existence needs to be addressed. Wounds, emotions, and beliefs are deeply engraved in your subconscious, as well as those in your body. You must take care of yourself holistically because you are whole yourself.

The relationship with yourself is the basis that enables you to function well and healthy in society and in relationships with other people.

This is the most important relationship in your life. If you do not love yourself, you will never be able to love others in a healthy way, because your internal conflicts will provoke external conflicts. The quality of your relationships with others reflects your contact with yourself, so you will never create a satisfying relationship with another person if you cannot build a relationship with yourself. Relationships between two people only make sense if each partner is happy with himself because each of us is responsible only for our own sense of happiness.

We cannot change thoughts and perceptions and the world of others because it is their individual matter. This is their reality, not yours. Each of us is responsible only for ourselves and for our own thoughts, choices, and happiness. To believe that someone else can make you happy is to lose the ground under your feet as soon as that person moves away. And from here it is only a step to a catastrophe. Self-love is the ability to create a healthy relationship with yourself.

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