How to be the best friend of yourself?

by Agata
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A graphic how to be depicting the face.

How to be the best friend of yourself?

How to be the biggest enemy of yourself you already know, don’t you? Too fat, too skinny, too stupid, boring, lazy, old, ugly …… (enter the missing word). With a thick ass, short legs, cellulite on the brain, tits like fried eggs, nose protruding from the face.

You are not suited for anything, you do not do enough, you can’t do anything right… In a word, one big walking error.

How many times a day do you talk that way to yourself?

Or maybe you’ve stopped paying attention to it at all. Can not you do it differently?

You can’t whip a dead horse, as they say. Down trip.

You think about spirituality, love for others, but you do not even know how to love yourself, don’t you? If you do not love yourself, then you can not give love to others because you simply do not have it.

Thousands of guides have been written about how to love yourself, how to be the best friend of yours. You read one after another, trying and keep coming back to the starting point. 

Theoretically, you know what to do, somehow the practice doesn’t work….

Or, on the contrary, have you turned into selfish egoists under their influence? The center of the universe with the inflated like balloon ego, which always and everywhere must shine.

This is not what it is all about.

First of all, you identify too much with this earthly form. You forget that you are a soul in human form, not a human form with a soul. You are only here for a moment. If you log out, you will come back in a different form. So, what do you woman need these complexes for?

Secondly, you create reality yourself. Not only part of reality but it’s whole. Using your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. Henry Ford said:

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right”.

So, what reality do you create yourself?

Have you realized yet?

Start observing your thoughts from today. Do not judge them, just notice. See how many times have you criticized yourself? How many times have you offended yourself and hurt yourself with your thinking? Realize when you do it, how you do it and why. Try to reach the core of these thoughts.

Then try to get to know yourself. Get to know your real needs that lie somewhere deep in the unconscious. Find out what you like and what you do not like, what brings you pleasure and what you are afraid of. We all have our weaknesses, shadows, complexes, repressed injuries, difficult to accept the content. There are no perfect people.

Do not believe what the media and the internet show you.

There are no perfect bodies. There are only our ideas on the subject and the tools we use trying to create them. Photoshop, plastic surgery, false eyelashes, make-up. We are trying to catch up with an idea that simply does not exist.

Understand that you are as perfect as you are.

You do not need anything more. You are part of the universe. Part of a larger whole. A universe expressing itself. An image of God. You have the universe in you. A huge sea of emotional processes, a biological garden. You are a cocktail of experiences, memories, and passions that will never be created this way again. Why would there be something wrong with you?

Is the dog with a drooping ear worried about its ear? No! Because it doesn’t watch Instagram every day comparing itself with other dogs in these super-duper filters retouched pictures. It was born that way and that is beautiful. You too! Do not compare yourself to others, you do not have any reason to do it. You are perfect as you are because you are yourself.

A picture of a dog.

Accept who you are, accept yourself.

Your mistakes and successes, your bright and dark side. Love them. It will make things easier for you because you will spend your whole life with yourself 24 hours a day nonstop. And the worst is that you will not be able to take a day of holiday from yourself. Never! 

Understand that all these criteria you compare to have been imposed on you by someone, maybe parents, maybe society. You grew up used to fighting for someone else’s attention, to feel important. But relying on the recognition by others really makes you stop being satisfied with yourself. Everything revolves around the opinions of others. And yet you are worthy of love regardless of everything. We are all worthy of love. And yet we are always looking for it outside of ourselves because we have been taught that we can only experience it thanks to something. However, it is enough just to be to get love. 

To love yourself, you must constantly think positively about yourself.

Also, when you are unable to accept some of your traits and behaviors. You must be honest with yourself. Be able to gain the courage to find not only advantages but also disadvantages. Discovering your strengths will give you more confidence, power, and joy.

You can also make an asset out of weakness.

Failure can motivate you to change your current life. Get rid of negative thoughts about yourself. Replace them by other, positive ones. You are the only thing in this world that you can control. You will not change the weather or the behavior of another person, but you can change yourself.

Give yourself time.

Do not feel guilty spending time thinking about yourself. The most important thing is to give yourself permission for your own love. This is a difficult process, especially since we have always been told to put others ahead, but you can do it. To love others, you need to know how to do it.

Forgive yourself, accept and respect.

Stop discrediting yourself for everything you are not and start recognizing who you are. If you love yourself, then you take care of yourself, respect your limitations, listen to your needs and follow your dreams.

Do not worry about the negative opinions of others about you.

Understand that how others treat you is just a reflection of how they treat themselves. Do not take everything to yourself. For you, the most important thing is what you think about yourself, not what somebody thinks about you.

Remember that you do not have to do everything that others do.

You do not have to get permission from someone to do something your own way. Your time on earth is priceless. Do not wait for someone to give you permission to live. Get away from those who depress you. Remember that the lack of a relationship is better than being in a bad relationship. 

Human life is characterized by ups and downs.

Sometimes you will celebrate who you are and feel confident with your skills. And sometimes you will feel insecure, ugly, fat, sloppy and hopeless. It’s all normal. But the more you practice love for yourself, the easier it will be to cope with what life will bring.

How to be the best friend of yourself?

It’s easy. Just the same as being the best friend of your friends. If you talk to others the way you talk to yourself, if you treat others the way you treat yourself, you would not have any friends. Remember that!

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